Galaxy Losers Again
Just not good enough is the verdict.
An unspectacular David Beckham. A sublime Blanco move. A goalkeeper and others - Sean Franklin is not the MLS MVP folks - that are just not good enough. Did I say that already?
At this stage of the season it's not worth doing tactical analysis. The season (again) has pretty much passed the Galaxy by.
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About 100 Percent Soccer
Sportswriter Nick Green has written the 100 Percent Soccer column since 2005 for the Daily News, Daily Breeze and other Los Angeles area newspapers. The blog of the same name began in 2007. A native of England, he began writing about soccer in the mid-1980s and in 2000 permanently exchanged a seat in the stands for one in the press box. He lives six miles from Carson's Home Depot Center, home of the Los Angeles Galaxy, Chivas USA and the training headquarters for U.S. Soccer and is married to a long-suffering soccer widow. Join Nick on FaceBook and follow him on Twitter.
I hope Arena blows this team up as much as possible in the off-season.
Those of you who still may be wondering why I rail on Alexi Lalas and Tim Leiweke, consider the following:
If you wish to see their monuments, look around you.
That goes for Gullit, as well, though to a lesser degree.
And now for something completely different: this poem by Big Soccer's Dan Loney. Truer words have rarely been written:
This morning when Timmy arrived at his job,
He was met by a furious torch-waving mob.
"You stuck us with Sampson! You gave us Alexi!
You hired that guy who thought football was sexy!
We're still in last place! The Galaxy stink!
Resign from your post! Yes, that's what we think!"
Tim raised his hands and said, "What can I do?
I'm mad as well, just as angry as you.
I went to the team and said, start playing better!
But the coach handed me a go-sex-yourself letter.
I did bring us Beckham, I did bring us Landon.
This lack of success wasn't something I planned on.
But I have the solution to keep us from reeking.
Take the old DP rule, and just give it a tweaking.
The salary cap is what's holding us back.
Free up some space and we'll soon be on track."
Just then spoke a man who arrived from Columbus
"Don't listen to him! He's just trying to numb us!
He'll cover his ass and he'll try to save face,
He just wants to change rules since he's stuck in last place!
He brought in Dominguez! He brought in Pires!
Why should we care what this idiot says?
We're not DC or Dallas, and we're not Kansas City.
To win, don't spend money on players who are ______.
Where I come from, our team has a motto,
Who needs a DP? We have Barros Schelotto!
You suck. And you're stuck. And you're ____ out of luck.
So go roll a donut, and take a flying ____."
But Timmy just shrugged and then quietly answered,
"This is Dr. Seuss cadence. Your lines have been censored.
As for you, fans, with your pitchforks and pickets,
We have two more home games, so you'd better buy tickets.
Our team is so bad, but we sell out each night.
Logically, then, I am doing things right."
And the crowd was left helpless and sad and frustrated
As they bought Beckham jerseys and then dissipated.
Timmy relaxed, he thought this was so funny.
He's not here to make friends.
He's just here to make money.